A man applies for a job at Argyll & Bute council and is invited in for interview. When he arrives he takes a seat in the interview room, while the head of the department leafs through his CV.

“I see you’re a Gulf War and Iraq War veteran?” The department head asks, visibly impressed.

“Yes – I love serving my country. That’s why I want to work for the council, now that I’m fit enough to return to work.”

“Oh, I see… you were invalided out of the forces?”

“Yes, unfortunately. I had both my testicles blown off after triggering a land mine in Iraq.” The applicant reveals. “I do hope you won’t hold that disability against my suitability for the job.”

“Of course not – in fact I’m humbled by the sacrifice you’ve made for your country.” The department head says, choked with emotion in the presence of one who had given so much. “As far as I’m concerned you’re exactly what we’re looking for – in fact, the job is yours if you want it.”

“That’s fantastic!” The applicant beams, “When can I start?”

“Well, Monday – if you’re available. We normally start at 9:00 and work until around 4:30 – it’s a short day, but you can come in about 12:00 if you like.”

“Really? Why’s that?”

“Well, the thing is…” The department head lowers his voice. “Here at Argyll & Bute we normally just sit around scratching our balls until lunch time…”

Yesterday morning we took Elisha to John Logie Baird primary school in order to enroll her for the term starting in August 2010. I had wanted to go along to speak to the head teacher after he’d said in the introduction meeting the week before that we could then ask questions specific to our child.

On that day I’d seen displays hung on the walls of the assembly hall, created by classes from each year. What got my attention was not the colourful work done by year 2 – a mural showing Dumbo the Elephant flying over some clowns, but the work done by year 1 showing the Christian story of creation.

Religious theology seemed a bit deep for year one, when year two was getting taught about flying elephants and clowns, so I made up my mind that I was going to question the head teacher regarding the level of religious agenda pushed upon the children at our follow-up meeting.

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I’ve received two emails from Amazon in 24 hours encouraging me to take advantage of their electronics deals in January. It doesn’t matter how many times they suggest it, or how many different ways they say it – I’m done spending for a good while!

Amazon and on and on...