Game On

5 Things I learned playing SingStar today

  1. If you miss a note, either give up on it as if you meant to sing it your way, or try to blend your pitch to hit that note. Sudden changes in pitch in an attempt to hunt down the missed note will make you sound like you’re fourteen again.
  2. Take on me is the kind of song you can only sing if your vocal range can display competancy whilst swiftly transitioning from low to high notes. Otherwise you end up “hunting high and low”, which, coincidentally, was the title of A-ha’s second hit. Both songs are also confirmation that Morten Harket was indeed “showing the fuck off” as you suspected back in 1985.
  3. Somehow you missed the fact that Take That videos were 99% aimed at the gay market and only 1% at the hot teenage chick market as opposed to the 20% gay / 80% hot teen chick split you’d previously assumed. This is why you feel uncomfortable performing Relight My Fire without any spandex on.
  4. Missing some words of a song with long held notes, such as R.E.M.’s Losing My Religion, and then attempting to play catch up will lead to you feeling extremely faint. The reason Michael Stipe feels the need to cram in words like foooool where you would like to breath is because rock stars like to make it difficult to sing their songs. If everyone could do it they wouldn’t get to be rich or famous.
  5. Singing a song that is out of gender can indeed be fun, although trying not to smirk whilst declaring I’m a bitch, I’m a tease, I’m a goddess on my knees is tough going. Until Chris Franklin‘s version appears on the SingStore, though, you’ll have to make do.
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